Some of the finest double entendres on British TV & Radio
Michael Burke on watching Phillipa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked:
"They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts."
Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open:
"Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself."
Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports:
"Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets."
Jack Burnicle was talking about Colin Edward's tyre choice on World Superbike racing:
"Colin had a hard on in practice earlier, and I bet he wished he had a hard on now."
Chris Tarrant discussing the first Millionaire winner Judith Keppel on This Morning TV:
"She was practising fastest finger first by herself in bed last night."
'Winning Post's' Stewart Machin commentating on jockey Tony McCoy's formidable lead:
"Tony has a quick look between his legs and likes what he sees."
Ross King discussing relays with champion runner Phil Redmond:
"Well Phil, tell us about your amazing third leg."
Cricketer Neil Fairbrother hit a single during a Durham v Lancashire match, inspiring Bobby Simpson to observe:
"With his lovely soft hands he just tossed it off."
Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said:
"There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this."
James Allen interviewing Ralf Schumacher at a Grand Prix, asked:
"What does it feel like being rammed up the backside by Barrichello?"
Steve Ryder covering the US Masters:
"Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69."
The new stand at Doncaster race course took Brough Scott's breath away...
"My word," he said. "Look at that magnificent erection."
Willie Carson was telling Claire Balding how jockeys prepare for a big race when he said:
"They usually have four or five dreams a night about coming from different positions."
Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on Time Team Live said:
"You'd eat beaver if you could get it."
A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked,
"So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?"
Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!
US PGA Commentator -
"One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ....
.. Oh my god!!!!! What have I just said?!!!!"
Metro Radio football match commentary -
"Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 -
"Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew."
Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator -
"This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother."
New Zealand Rugby Commentator -
"Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him."
Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator -
"And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!"
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring
Snowin' and blowin' up bushels of fun
Now the jingle hop has begun
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells chime in jingle bell time
Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air
What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh
Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet
Jingle around the clock
Mix and a-mingle in the jinglin' feet
That's the jingle bell rock
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bell chime in jingle bell time
Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air
What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh
Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet
Jingle around the clock
Mix and a-mingle in the jinglin' feet
That's the jingle bell
That's the jingle bell
That's the jingle...
David Daniel Ball calls himself the Conservative Voice.
I'm a teacher with three decades experience teaching math to high school kids.I also work with first graders and kids in between first grade and high school. I know the legends of why Hypatia's dad is remembered through his contribution to Math theory. And I know the legend of why followers of Godel had thought he had disproved God's existence.
I'm not a preacher, but I am a Christian who has written over 28 books all of which include some reference to my faith. Twelve blog books on world history and current affairs, detailing world events , births and marriages on each day of the year, organised by month. Twelve books on the background to and history of Bible Quotes. One Bible quote per day for a year. An intro to a science fiction series I'm planning, post apocalyptic cyber punk. An autobiography with short story collections.
I'm known in Australia for my failure as a whistleblower over the negligence death of a school boy. ...
In Tanami’s red sands where spinifex grows,
Where waterholes gleam ‘neath the sun’s golden glare,
Lived Yaparla, sweet maid, with a heart pure as snow,
Her kindness a light in the desert so bare.
Her father, a wise man, kept songs for the land,
To guard the soak’s waters where life held its sway.
But drought gripped the earth with a merciless hand,
And he sought a new spring to ease their dismay.
Deep in a gorge where the rocks hid the sky,
He found a clear pool with fish dancing free.
But a voice shook the stones with a thunderous cry,
“Who steals my sweet water without leave of me?”
Out slid the Wanyarra, half-man, half a snake,
His scales flashed like opals, his eyes cold with pain.
“For your kin’s life,” he hissed, “one price I must take—
Send Yaparla to me, or your land drinks no rain.”
The father returned, his heart heavy with woe,
And told his dear daughter the serpent’s demand.
“I’ll go,” said Yaparla, her voice soft and low,
“For my people, my country, I’ll walk that red sand.”
She came to the gorge with her digging stick strong,
Singing songs of her kin ‘neath ...
AI adapted
To adapt the story of Bambi to the Dreamtime of Warlpiri culture in the Tanami Desert, we’ll reimagine the tale with respect for Warlpiri storytelling traditions, cosmology, and the desert environment. The Dreamtime (Jukurrpa) is a sacred framework where ancestral beings shape the land, law, and life, so Bambi’s journey will reflect Warlpiri values like kinship, connection to country, and survival in harmony with nature. I’ll keep the essence of Bambi—a young creature’s growth amid loss and discovery—while grounding it in the Tanami’s ecology and Warlpiri worldview. Since Bambi is a specific narrative, I’ll translate its core themes rather than reproduce the original text verbatim, ensuring cultural sensitivity. The story will be concise yet vivid, as requested.
Bambi in the Jukurrpa of the Tanami
In the Jukurrpa, when the Tanami Desert glowed under the first stars, the ancestral beings shaped the land. From the spinifex and red sand, they formed Jampijinpa, a young red ...
Created with Grok, Pictory, And Topmediai
Content from listening to podcasters Hunley and Groubert of America's Untold Stories. They tell it better than me
Folk Song: "The Ballad of Lee Harvey Oswald"
Verse 1
Oh, Lee Harvey Oswald, a man they did frame,
The deep state and CIA, they tarnished his name.
They said he went to Mexico, a lie they did spin,
While he fought for his service, his honor within.
Chorus
Sing for Lee Oswald, innocent and bold,
Framed by the shadows, a story untold.
With courage he stood, though the truth they denied,
A patriot’s heart in a nation that lied.
Verse 2
On that dark day in Dallas, they said he shot Tippit,
Left a wallet behind, but the tale didn’t fit.
Arrested with his own in hand, the proof was right there,
But the deep state kept spinnin’ their web of despair.
Chorus
Sing for Lee Oswald, innocent and bold,
Framed by the shadows, a story untold.
With courage he stood, though the truth they denied,
A patriot’s heart in a nation that lied.
Verse 3
They trained him in Russian, sent him off to the East,
A ...
