

Some of the finest double entendres on British TV & Radio
Michael Burke on watching Phillipa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked:
"They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts."
Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open:
"Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself."
Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports:
"Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets."
Jack Burnicle was talking about Colin Edward's tyre choice on World Superbike racing:
"Colin had a hard on in practice earlier, and I bet he wished he had a hard on now."
Chris Tarrant discussing the first Millionaire winner Judith Keppel on This Morning TV:
"She was practising fastest finger first by herself in bed last night."
'Winning Post's' Stewart Machin commentating on jockey Tony McCoy's formidable lead:
"Tony has a quick look between his legs and likes what he sees."
Ross King discussing relays with champion runner Phil Redmond:
"Well Phil, tell us about your amazing third leg."
Cricketer Neil Fairbrother hit a single during a Durham v Lancashire match, inspiring Bobby Simpson to observe:
"With his lovely soft hands he just tossed it off."
Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said:
"There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this."
James Allen interviewing Ralf Schumacher at a Grand Prix, asked:
"What does it feel like being rammed up the backside by Barrichello?"
Steve Ryder covering the US Masters:
"Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69."
The new stand at Doncaster race course took Brough Scott's breath away...
"My word," he said. "Look at that magnificent erection."
Willie Carson was telling Claire Balding how jockeys prepare for a big race when he said:
"They usually have four or five dreams a night about coming from different positions."
Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on Time Team Live said:
"You'd eat beaver if you could get it."
A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked,
"So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?"
Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!
US PGA Commentator -
"One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ....
.. Oh my god!!!!! What have I just said?!!!!"
Metro Radio football match commentary -
"Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 -
"Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew."
Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator -
"This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother."
New Zealand Rugby Commentator -
"Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him."
Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator -
"And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!"
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring
Snowin' and blowin' up bushels of fun
Now the jingle hop has begun
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells chime in jingle bell time
Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air
What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh
Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet
Jingle around the clock
Mix and a-mingle in the jinglin' feet
That's the jingle bell rock
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bell chime in jingle bell time
Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air
What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh
Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet
Jingle around the clock
Mix and a-mingle in the jinglin' feet
That's the jingle bell
That's the jingle bell
That's the jingle...
David Daniel Ball calls himself the Conservative Voice.
I'm a teacher with three decades experience teaching math to high school kids.I also work with first graders and kids in between first grade and high school. I know the legends of why Hypatia's dad is remembered through his contribution to Math theory. And I know the legend of why followers of Godel had thought he had disproved God's existence.
I'm not a preacher, but I am a Christian who has written over 28 books all of which include some reference to my faith. Twelve blog books on world history and current affairs, detailing world events , births and marriages on each day of the year, organised by month. Twelve books on the background to and history of Bible Quotes. One Bible quote per day for a year. An intro to a science fiction series I'm planning, post apocalyptic cyber punk. An autobiography with short story collections.
I'm known in Australia for my failure as a whistleblower over the negligence death of a school boy. ...
The Ballad of David Ball
[Verse 1]
In New York City, '67, a child was born so bold,
David Ball, with dreams afire, where Sesame Street was told.
His father shaped young minds at Columbia's hall so grand,
Till the '70s called them homeward to Sydney's distant land.
[Chorus]
Oh, sing of David Ball, with a heart both strong and true,
From classroom tales to whistle’s call, his spirit breaking through.
With pen in hand and faith so deep, he writes through joy and pain,
A voice for justice, loud and clear, in every sweet refrain.
[Verse 2]
Self-taught he read by Sydney's shore, with numbers as his guide,
A math teacher in the tough schools, where hope and youth ...
This is edited to correct obvious mistakes
David Daniel Ball (born January 10, 1967, in New York City) is an Australian writer, conservative blogger, political activist, and former high school mathematics teacher. As the younger brother of cognitive scientist John Samuel Ball, David has carved a distinct path in education, advocacy, and self-publishing, often focusing on social justice, child protection, history, and Christian devotionals. His life story intertwines family intellectual heritage with personal campaigns against institutional failures in child welfare.
David was born in Manhattan during his father Samuel Ball's (1933–2009) tenure as an educational psychologist at Teachers College, Columbia University. Samuel, an Australian academic, contributed to early evaluations of Sesame Street through his work at the Educational Testing Service (ETS), assessing the show's impact on children's learning from 1963 onward. The family, including elder brother John (born 1963 in Iowa), relocated to ...
I invite you with: "Right now, let's respond by seeking Him first. If you're carrying worries, lay them down at His feet. Raise your hands, pray silently, or come forward for prayer as we declare His kingdom priority in our lives." This encourages active faith application, tying back to Matthew 6:33's promise.
https://storiesthatheal.blogspot.com/2016/09/bible-quote-sep-28th-matthew-633.html
Verse 1
In the whisper of the wind, You call my name
Beyond the worries of this world, Your kingdom reigns
Like lilies in the field, clothed in Your grace
I lift my eyes to You, in this sacred place
Chorus
Seek first Your kingdom, oh Lord
And Your righteousness, forevermore
All these things will be added, in Your perfect time
Man does not live by bread alone, but by every word from Your throne
We seek You first, we seek You first
Verse 2
From ancient words You spoke, in the mountaintop light
You taught us not to fear, in the dead of night
Your promise echoes through the ages, ...