ARTIFICIAL INSEMINATION: Procreation without recreation.
BOOKCASE: A piece of furniture used in America to house bowling trophies and Elvis collectibles.
BULIMIA: Retched excess.
CHIC: Considered smart without the deadening implication of intelligence.
CLIQUE: A group of insiders who greet outsiders with their backsides; a closed circle of asses.
CONSULTANT: A jobless person who shows executives how to work.
DENTURES: Two rows of artificial ivories that may be removed periodically to frighten one's grandchildren or provide accompaniment to Spanish music.
DNA: A complex organic molecule characterized as the building block of life and appropriately shaped like a spiral staircase to nowhere.
ERUDITE: Exhibiting a degree of book learning fatal to success in any business or romantic enterprise.
FIBER: Edible wood-pulp said to aid digestion and prolong life, so that we might enjoy another six or eight years in which to consume wood-pulp.
FUNERAL HOME: A stately manse occupied by transients who continually receive visitors but lack the energy and inclination to entertain them.
GENETIC ENGINEERING: Tampering with chromosomes so that science might develop a new miracle cure or a rabbit that plays the banjo.
HIP: Smartly attuned to the latest cutting-edge cliches.
JOB: A state of employment everyone wants but few look forward to on a Monday morning.
LAWYER: A professional advocate hired to bend the law on behalf of a paying client; for this reason considered the most suitable background for entry into politics.
LECHER: A stud with liver spots.
LOOTING: A public shopping spree generously sponsored by local merchants in the wake of a riot.
LOTTERY: The equivalent of betting that the next pope will be from Duluth, or that the parrot in the pet store window speaks Flemish.
MATH ANXIETY: An intense lifelong fear of two trains approaching each other at speeds of 60 and 80 mph.
MUGGER: A benevolent citizen of the streets who frequently spares the lives of total strangers in exchange for any cash and valuables in their possession.
NEGOTIATING: The art of persuading your opponent to take the nice shiny copper penny and give you the wrinkled old paper money.
NEUROTIC: Sane but unhappy about it.
OBITUARY: A final summation of our lives that, for most of us, occupies about three inches of space in what will shortly become cage liner for our neighbor's parakeet.
POSITIVE THINKING: Self-improvement through self-deception.
QUALITY OF LIFE: What an industrialized nation is said to offer when enough of its citizens are suffering from terminal stress.
REVOLUTIONARY: An oppressed person wating for the opportunity to become an oppressor.
SHALLOWNESS: The root cause of chronic good health, high school popularity, appearance on the fiction bestseller lists, and gainful employment on local TV news broadcasts.
STAR: A performer who makes more than his or her agent. Also SUPERSTAR: A performer who makes more than Guatemala.
STATE-OF-THE-ART: Soon-to-be-obsolete.
TABOO: Any strict cultural prohibition that, when breached, causes everyone in the group to gasp; e.g., cannibalism, public nudity, serving fried pork rinds at a Hasidic wedding, or answering the question "How are you?" in the negative.
UNEMPLOYMENT: The usual alternative to overwork.
URINAL: The one place where all men are peers.
VIRGIN: A young innocent who in former times was sacrificed to the gods but who now merely lives in disgrace.
WAKE: 1. A convivial soiree with a preserved corpse in the room. 2. What the mourners would be visibly startled to see the corpse do, especially those expecting a sizable inheritance.
X-CHROMOSOME: A genetic double-cross that empowers women with the ability to bear children and reserves for men the right to be color- blind hemophiliacs.
ZOMBIE: A mirthless creature beloved by teenage horror movie fans and those in charge of the hiring at accounting firms.
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring
Snowin' and blowin' up bushels of fun
Now the jingle hop has begun
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells chime in jingle bell time
Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air
What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh
Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet
Jingle around the clock
Mix and a-mingle in the jinglin' feet
That's the jingle bell rock
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bell chime in jingle bell time
Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air
What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh
Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet
Jingle around the clock
Mix and a-mingle in the jinglin' feet
That's the jingle bell
That's the jingle bell
That's the jingle...
David Daniel Ball calls himself the Conservative Voice.
I'm a teacher with three decades experience teaching math to high school kids.I also work with first graders and kids in between first grade and high school. I know the legends of why Hypatia's dad is remembered through his contribution to Math theory. And I know the legend of why followers of Godel had thought he had disproved God's existence.
I'm not a preacher, but I am a Christian who has written over 28 books all of which include some reference to my faith. Twelve blog books on world history and current affairs, detailing world events , births and marriages on each day of the year, organised by month. Twelve books on the background to and history of Bible Quotes. One Bible quote per day for a year. An intro to a science fiction series I'm planning, post apocalyptic cyber punk. An autobiography with short story collections.
I'm known in Australia for my failure as a whistleblower over the negligence death of a school boy. ...
In Tanami’s red sands where spinifex grows,
Where waterholes gleam ‘neath the sun’s golden glare,
Lived Yaparla, sweet maid, with a heart pure as snow,
Her kindness a light in the desert so bare.
Her father, a wise man, kept songs for the land,
To guard the soak’s waters where life held its sway.
But drought gripped the earth with a merciless hand,
And he sought a new spring to ease their dismay.
Deep in a gorge where the rocks hid the sky,
He found a clear pool with fish dancing free.
But a voice shook the stones with a thunderous cry,
“Who steals my sweet water without leave of me?”
Out slid the Wanyarra, half-man, half a snake,
His scales flashed like opals, his eyes cold with pain.
“For your kin’s life,” he hissed, “one price I must take—
Send Yaparla to me, or your land drinks no rain.”
The father returned, his heart heavy with woe,
And told his dear daughter the serpent’s demand.
“I’ll go,” said Yaparla, her voice soft and low,
“For my people, my country, I’ll walk that red sand.”
She came to the gorge with her digging stick strong,
Singing songs of her kin ‘neath ...
AI adapted
To adapt the story of Bambi to the Dreamtime of Warlpiri culture in the Tanami Desert, we’ll reimagine the tale with respect for Warlpiri storytelling traditions, cosmology, and the desert environment. The Dreamtime (Jukurrpa) is a sacred framework where ancestral beings shape the land, law, and life, so Bambi’s journey will reflect Warlpiri values like kinship, connection to country, and survival in harmony with nature. I’ll keep the essence of Bambi—a young creature’s growth amid loss and discovery—while grounding it in the Tanami’s ecology and Warlpiri worldview. Since Bambi is a specific narrative, I’ll translate its core themes rather than reproduce the original text verbatim, ensuring cultural sensitivity. The story will be concise yet vivid, as requested.
Bambi in the Jukurrpa of the Tanami
In the Jukurrpa, when the Tanami Desert glowed under the first stars, the ancestral beings shaped the land. From the spinifex and red sand, they formed Jampijinpa, a young red ...
Created with Grok, Pictory, And Topmediai
Content from listening to podcasters Hunley and Groubert of America's Untold Stories. They tell it better than me
Folk Song: "The Ballad of Lee Harvey Oswald"
Verse 1
Oh, Lee Harvey Oswald, a man they did frame,
The deep state and CIA, they tarnished his name.
They said he went to Mexico, a lie they did spin,
While he fought for his service, his honor within.
Chorus
Sing for Lee Oswald, innocent and bold,
Framed by the shadows, a story untold.
With courage he stood, though the truth they denied,
A patriot’s heart in a nation that lied.
Verse 2
On that dark day in Dallas, they said he shot Tippit,
Left a wallet behind, but the tale didn’t fit.
Arrested with his own in hand, the proof was right there,
But the deep state kept spinnin’ their web of despair.
Chorus
Sing for Lee Oswald, innocent and bold,
Framed by the shadows, a story untold.
With courage he stood, though the truth they denied,
A patriot’s heart in a nation that lied.
Verse 3
They trained him in Russian, sent him off to the East,
A ...
